Tedesche

If I could teleport other people into a Tool music video, this wins hands down.

Please tell me this is just really good AI slop….

Back in my 20’s I was backpacking through Europe and had heard that Parisians were generally friendly to American tourists, but the one thing I was told was to start every conversation at least attempting to speak French. I did so, and everyone I spoke to either started speaking English or politely referred me to someone who did. There was only one incident I had there. I was ordering dinner in a restaurant and I asked the waiter what wine he recommended with the meal I’d ordered. This is a fairly common thing to do in America, but this poor waiter looked at me like I had just transformed into a 4th-dimensional kaleidoscopic entity before his very eyes. I mean, he totally froze, eyes wide, jaw slack. I immediately felt so bad that I just ordered the first red wine I saw on the list and the relief on his face was palpable, but he still looked shaken.

I think French people are just so familiar with wine that they can’t comprehend people who aren’t. If you ever visit France, do some basic research just so you don’t freak them out.

Not a woman either but I would think that since pickles don’t burn the inside of your mouth, they wouldn’t burn the inside of a vagina.

Can we please hear from a woman who’s stuck a pickle in her vag? We have a serious scientific inquiry that needs answers.

Only to play the shitty games that suck ass.

Dishwashing liquid? That’s just good bedhead.

Well, technically, good bedhead is something much more satisfying, but I hope y’all get my drift.