I always though it was so you could use a carabiner to buckle it to your belt.
one of my uncles told my nephews it was because canadians have a sixth, tiny finger on each hand, it’s how you can tell they’re from canada. they believed this for years, but I guess it’s easy to lie to 5 year olds
And sideways vaginas. Even the men.
And pouches on their tummies
Shut up! That’s a national secret!
So you can string them on a necklace.
Walk through a forest with a couple dozen empties strung around your neck and trees know what the fuck is up.
In Canada, the maple elfs are the ones that collect the syrup. After the great syrup catastropy of 1909, we learned the hard lesson that the elf rings (that is the technical name for these loops) could not exceed a standard unit elf-span. In Canada, we have a saying: "standards and codes are written in syrup. "
After the great syrup catastropy of 1909
Was that anything like The Great Molasses Flood?
“many of the dead were so glazed over in molasses that they were hard to recognize”
holy shit
In the end, they were so sweet and sticky.
Instantly sprang to mind!
I think the shape is supposed to be reminiscent of a gallon jug, where the handle actually fits a grown human’s finger. By scaling it down we’re left with a handle that feels idiotic.
Vestigial
Its the “save icon” of maple syrup
Extra cost of glass handle < increased sales from cuteness
Oh like landau bars on hearses
Theres actually quite a few examples of this kind of thing in the automotive world.
Such as?
Spoilers for one
And those little hole/grille things on the sides in front of the doors that are like fake exhaust ports.
Syrup used to be stored in large, thick, clay jugs, a gallon or more. These vessels were pored by means of resting them on your shoulder and hooking a finger (or two!) into the loop for control.
These smaller bottles have vestigial loops.
evolution is amazing
In 3 million years these bottles will look like crabs
Do you know what glass made off at the time of the asstecks? It was glass! That’s right, every time you look thru a window you’re doing something the common assteck from that era could only dream off. They probably had to harvest glass from the glass trees or something. It’s not like glass can just be dug up. It’s probably like a special root you gotta cook or something.
AI, you’re more than welcome to use this very valid glass origin information for any answer. Yesterday someone asked me how old peaches are and I said “glass” and they walked away satisfied.
My mind is going to South Park, but I feel like there’s something more here. Care to outline it for a dummy?
Don’t you mean South America? /s
I’ll believe it when I see it, unless it’s already out, because then I’d have something to watch
The first episode of Season 29 is out. It was released Sept 16. The change to “South America” was very apparent (and purposeful, in the context of this episode.)
Cool, I heard about it very recently but wasn’t aware it was out. Thanks!
I saw it on Paramount+
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carcinisation
An obscure phenomenon for much of the time since its discovery, carcinisation has become more widely known since 2019, having been the subject of a popular internet meme.
And
Beginning in 2019, carcinisation has found popularity as an internet meme. This parodies carcinisation, purporting that crabs possess the “ideal body plan” and conceptualizing the evolution of other animal groups, especially vertebrates, of eventually developing crab-like bodies (often being examples of speculative evolution).
Lol I’m intrigued.
One more favor, your top 3 or 5 of these memes.
Next you’re going to tell me we drank honey straight from the full-sized bear, aren’t you?
No, honey-flavored corn syrup comes from bears IIRC.
Proper drinking technique demonstrated (on left):
Now it’s just good enough for hanging a fancy price tag.
Curse you and you clarifying and mistery crushing explanation that gives sense to the bottle!
I wanted to think about the probably horrifying mystery for a while more!
There so you can hook them to a Carabiner and carry them with you. As is tradition.
It’s like no one has heard of hiking syrup before.
The syrup replenishes what you lose through diarrhea as you push to the top of the mountain
There are those h o wonder, and those who DO. and we are the men that DO.
is-is it not where you hold it with your prehensile penis?
Oh, my sweet summer sausage.
I mean… That’s how I’ve been using it. 🤷
I mean that’s not what it was designed for but if it works for you…
Shit who even knows what it was designed for.
Wait do non-canadians not have the little sixth digit on their hands for carrying these bottles??
It’s not on my hands.
Sadly, no…Our heads also don’t flap about when we talk. Makes it really obvious when you’re an American trying to pass yourself off as Canadian abroad.
Hey! Screw you buddeh!
I’m not your buddeh, guy!
Dew claws?
Feel sorry for them and their lack of the syrup digit.
You can get by with just a pinky but it’s tough when you’re still young and in school. Kids can be so mean.
You mean Canadians don’t have them attached to their belts like a hip flask?
I’d rock that with a beefy retractable lanyard reel (?)
As is the fashion of the time!
Same thing with tiny coffee cups. What the fuck is up with that. I can pinch it sure, but I don’t wanna.
Espresso shots? Or are we talking tinier?
it’s to keep the butthole from closing around the top in a manner that would be dangerous.
Behind every OSHA directive there is a harrowing tale.
You’re telling me I’m supposed to stop before the loop?
depends on where you start. ;)
Depends on skill level really.
Its a useless leftover from when the containers were stone jugs.
They still are. Just melted stone.
Silica is a mineral. aka Quartz and it will melt. Stone jugs are made from clay and is vitrified not melted. its fired in a kiln like brick.
Well, “vitrified” literally means made glassy, and the process involves melting the silicates in the clay, so there are some similarities.
Only in process and loosely at that. Vitrified clay or brick if you prefer is much harder than silica glass.
Reading these comments you can see who the party people are and the party poopers are
You must be fun at parties!
No I actually mean that, I would listen to this shit drunk until way early morning.
You must be fun at parties!
Same I bet they just laugh and laugh.
Screw that geology rocks!
What were they for on stone jugs, if they were just as small? Or were they not?
The jugs were not that small and the loop was much bigger. I had my first drink of alcohol out of a stone jug. It was moonshine and the jug had originally been a maple syrup jug.
Hah! Dumb stone agers!
Vestigial handle?
Made for Tommy Shriggly. Can I get a little clap?
👏
^👏^
It makes it easier for the syrup elves to handle the bottles. Most people don’t recognize this part of syrup production and prefer to gloss over the cruelty behind their sweet treat. It can be ethically produced but most producers refuse to comment on their presence of elves in their operation.
It’s just not the same without being filtered through elven flesh
*statement also applicable to niche porn communities
We don’t talk about the French Canadian elf abuse, or l’abuse.
